Saturday, March 22, 2014

Girl Sout cookies are laced with crack.

Hey peeps.  Nothing very exciting happening here.  I am 23 weeks tomorrow which means only 1 more week until viability!  It's a somewhat reassuring milestone but of course I hope she stays in there until at least July.  My midwives wont deliver her if she comes before June 29th so I have that date as my goal beat.

So at 23 weeks pregnant that means I only have 17 more weeks to go before my due date.....WTF?!  It's weird to get to the point where instead of counting up and wanting the number to get larger I am now counting down and getting excited/terrified with how short of a time we have left.  I am actually not terrified....more like in denial.  When I imagine how our lives will be with baby Hazy it is just too abstract.  It feels surreal still.  I thought seeing her face and getting confirmation that she is healthy would solidify things but it just makes it harder to wrap my head around it.  I mean, seriously?  THAT little baby with THAT face is inside my right now?  ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS??? 

I still feel like I am a crazy lady who was so desperate for a baby I convinced myself and everyone around me that I am pregnant but really I've just been getting fat by eating all those damn Girl Scout cookies.  For real, I bought 13 boxes.  I think they are laced with crack.  I just read an article on yahoo news about a Canadian woman who faked that she was expecting quints.  Supposedly her boyfriend was even fooled.  There's a picture of them in their nursery with 5 cribs crammed in there.  She was only discovered to be a fraud (a seriously mentally ill fraud) when her "water broke", she was "lactating" and they went into the hospital to deliver!  I'm pretty sure I would have been found out at my anatomy scan last week but still I can't shake the feeling that I'm a fraud masquerading as a pregnant women.

Moving on.  Hazy has made her presence known a little bit more in the last week and a half.  Mostly on Thursday nights for some reason.  Last Thursday B felt a good kick!  Two nights ago she had some part of her body pushing outward and you could feel it from the outside of my belly.  It was pretty cool to touch it and know I was touching my baby girl.

We continue with our "cleaning out of everything we own before baby comes" project.   Last week we removed 5 bags of books from our house and donated to them to Good Will along with a bunch of shoes and clothes from cleaning out our closets.  We still have many other closets to clean out and today we tackle the basement.

We also picked out wall paint for Hazy's room.  It was a fight.  Don't ever marry an artist if you ever want to have any say over what shade of paint you use in your house.  Jesus.  I literally had to listen to B lecture me on how the shade of green I wanted was "too cool of a tone" to match the other paint in that room.  If it wasn't for the two nerdy paint store workers politely trying to ignore our marital spat I would have strangled him.  I only get physically abusive when there are no witnesses.  Just kidding.  We eventually brought a bunch of paint strips home, put them on the wall and miraculously came to agree on "springtime green".  We haven't actually painted yet but we will in a couple of weekends.

Next weekend we are going to the beach!  Yes, in the PNW, in the very beginning of spring.  It will be cold, windy, rainy...everything you want for a 3 day beach trip.  It will just be nice to have a 3 day weekend and be able to spend time together with the dogs.  B's dad and his dad's girlfriend are going to meet us there with their dogs.  It should be relaxing and fun.  Even if we are stuck inside the whole time.  I admit I am excited to take some pregnant beach shots.  The only photos I have of my pregnancy are the belly pics that I am only posting on this blog.  We haven't been taking any photos because we weren't completely public about the pregnancy until last weekend. 

In other non baby related news, I took my dog to the vet and while I was signing us in she promptly took a giant shit all over their entry way mat.  I didn't notice until I had already turned around and stepped in it.  Thanks Ruby. 

Ps. I posted my belly pic from last week if you want to see it.  


  1. Woah, I can not even imagine counting down... I am totally laughing about the GS cookies. Husband bought two boxes and we ate them both in less than 24 hours. Hope you have a great time on your beach get away and maybe even get lucky with some sunshine.

    1. Hey T, what midwives are you seeing? I've got a contact me box on my box now if you want to send me the info privately.

    2. On my blog! Not on my box, LOL! Is it too early to claim pregnancy brain?

  2. Wow. I had to google the fake quintuplet lady! I have actually heard of a phantom pregnancy before, but this is the first time I've read a story about it! crazy...

    Glad you were able to agree on a colour for the nursery. I hope you post pics once you've painted it!

  3. AH she'll be here soon! Less time left than has already past! :)

  4. It's a known fact that crack is a secret ingredient in Girl Scout cookies, don't feel bad. I have a box stashed in my freezer for the day I'm allowed to eat gluten again. Reallllly looking forward to it.

    And also, I'm so glad to know that I'm not the only one fighting with their spouse about nursery paint colors. And mine isn't even an artist!

  5. I totally agree that it's a weird abstract thing for us to be mums. I mean, us, really? Sometimes I think people are playing a joke on me when I go to the ultrasound scan and there's not really two babies in there. I loved doing a big cleanout too, amazing, we got rid of so much stuff.

  6. I totally agree how strange it is to think that in a few weeks, we'll be holding babies. Every time I buy baby clothes, I expect someone to point me out to the store and let everyone know that I'm not really pregnant. I would have thought the ultrasounds, the kicks, the whole experience would have somehow proven to my brain that a baby will be here come August, but I still don't fully believe it!